Parentella

“Emotional intelligence” – what IS it? Is it just another in the plethora of positive parenting catchphrases out there, or the bedrock in raising positive, joyful, successful kids? 

 

Dr. J.D. Mayer and his colleagues at the University of New Hampshire define emotional intelligence thusly:

 

“Emotional intelligence refers to an ability to recognize the meanings of emotion and their relationships, and to reason and problem-solve on the basis of them. Emotional intelligence is involved in the capacity to perceive emotions, assimilate emotion-related feelings, understand the information of those emotions, and manage them.”

 

If EI is essentially “The intelligent intersection of emotions and thoughts,” then it would ostensibly be a key component in early childhood education. After all, developmental thought and decision-making throughout life cannot happen in a vacuum; emotions are unavoidable players in the human condition.

 

From a child having difficulty sharing a toy to an adult grappling with the ethics of insider trading, emotional intelligence unquestionably impinges on actions. Is the glass half empty or half full? The EI quotient of the viewer can make a difference in the answer. 

 

 

So…how as parents do we foster the growth and development of emotional intelligence in our children? How do we teach them to thoughtfully empathize, to consider more than just the facts, to think with their hearts? Understanding the emotions that may be at play in a situation can help tremendously in the cultivation of the coping skills we all need to face every day successfully. But how do you train yourself to recognize their importance while you're IN the situation?

 

Here are some resources to help you start thinking about these important conversations:

 

 

E is for Ethics: How to Talk to Kids About Morals, Ethics and What Matters Most by Ian James Corlett.

 

Raising Happiness: 10 Simple Steps for More Joyful Kids and Happier Parents by Christine Carter.

 

Emotional Intelligence: Why it Can Matter More Than IQ by Daniel Goleman.

 

 

 

How do YOU encourage your children to exercise Emotional Intelligence? Share your strategies with us in the comments!

 

By Lindsay Maines